Not A Will To Death...

This is not the will to death
No drive of carbon to purge breath
Just exhausted impatience & infatuation
with the peculiar foreign notion
of an easier way out
of a life tired from ceaselessly searching
for some elusive thing to be about

As devils ever scheme and scream
the angels remain reticent in dream

These voices scream of what to do
in platitudes of "do or die" or "follow through"
They convince of things to long to do,
and to pave the way for things moved unto,
but reach new dead-ends and nothing new

Then same voices whisper
"why bother", "nothing matters", "what's it to you"
'till all sounds stranded despite the tune you choose
and no destination offers no things to prove
leaving a yearning to yearn
for some distant point toward which to move
All will then turns against its self within
making what's lost in life look toward death to win

As devils ever scream and scheme
the angels remain reticent in dream

Few stranded souls shall seek some silence
which can't be heard amid screaming violence
For who can wait for angels to murmur
prayers for things there are no words for
or wait for devils to blow their voice out
screaming "more" forever more
Fewer still find the sacraments of solitude
and leave behind black-art rituals of oblivion's mood

As devils ever scream and scheme
angels still remain reticent in dream

No. This is not the will to death
Just a need to take some deeper breath
and leave the shadow-seeking path
which darkly leads to failure's wrath
adding each triumphant step to its aftermath

No. "This is not the will to death"
I say and take another breath
Just exhausted impatience & infatuation
with the peculiar foreign notion
of an easier way out
of life tired from ceaselessly searching
for some elusive thing to be about